How to Gain Trust
While it is easy for babies to trust us completely it is a far harder task to trust others as an adult.
When couples do not fully trust each other then their relationship suffers. What can be done about this?
After taking steps to improve your ability to trust (see below) then go to the link "Keys to Healthy Relationship" and/or book an appointment.
There are two different kinds of trust. Be sure you're not expecting the wrong one!
- A baby or child's trust of his/her caregiver. This type of trust is an unquestioning trust that the other will take care of me, physically and emotionally. "I am secure in her or his arms."
- An adult trust. This trust begins with trusting myself. Do I deserve the trust of another or am I judgmental, aloof, in-congruent, disrespectful of myself and others and suffer from poor self-esteem? If the latter than you are hardly ready to fully trust in a relationship with another!
This couple clearly do not trust each other. It is likely they are in pain and not embracing their own lives, but are instead negatively focused on each other!
This means they are giving away their power to think and feel better about themselves. This is a naive belief that the other can "make" me happy, content, loved, etc. This is not (adult) trust.
One or (most likely) both of the above mates have not learned how to trust in a healthy way in large part because they did not securely bond/attach/connect to their parents or caregivers. Professional help is usually needed to overcome the difficulties with trusting in an intimate relationships.
Do you want to learn more about how this early need to trust is left unfulfilled? Check out this article.
According to the awesome research of Brené Brown we need to offer what we wish from others. This is a responsible, adult, form of trust.
You can watch her share her research results by clicking here.
Are you ready to have more satisfying relationships with your loved ones, work-mates and others? Be empowered. Do book an appointment now, while you're thinking about it.